This is not a veterinary story in any way, though it does reference an alternative word for cat and well as the word “vagina.” I wish I could tell the story in person, because the pronunciation is key.
I used to work for a very funny man…. He often said wildly inappropriate things and I think he even made a joke and rubbed his nipples at my job interview. But as he reminded me of Baloo the bear and when he said “I love you” to his staff (and meant it), I never took offense.
His recounting of stories was amazing, often including spot on imitations as well as bursting out into operatic song. This is one of his stories.
While he was in vet school, his wife was a teacher at an inner city school in the late 1980’s. This was about the time the group 2 Live Crew was pumping out songs destined to be banned. If you know 2 Live Crew, you know where this story is heading.
A kindergartener was skipping along the halls of the school singing, “Hey, hey, we want some puuussssy….” (click for full lyrics)
Said kindergartener was promptly tagged and bagged by his teacher and he was taken into the principal’s office. There the principal demanded if he knew what “a pussy is.”
The kid looked down and shuffled his feet, “I dunno, something you eat?”
Fo rizzal, to quote someone slightly more contemporary Luther Campbell. He said that. Well, at least he was getting some sexual education.
The icing on the cake was when the principal, a rather buttoned up woman shouted, “It’s not pussy, the word is VAG-in- A, VAG-in-A.”
Life, it is real and it is weird.