I don't know if any of my colleagues enjoy callbacks. Personally, I get nervous calling someone back. What if they ask me something I don't know? (That's a rhetorical question. In fact, if someone asks me something I don't know, I will generally say "I don't know, let me check and get back to you." But I don't like it!) I do enjoy teaching things to people who are both interested in the subject matter and intellectually capable of grasping the subject matter quickly - but unfortunately for me, it seems my client base is not largely made up of such individuals. I therefore end up teaching things, or attempting to teach things, to other types of people, and to put it as politely as possible - I simply do not enjoy it as much when that happens, so, I generally dread callbacks, because I never know who I'm going to end up talking to - even if I'm calling someone I know, often, a third party answers the phone, after all.
That aside, here's a list of things that drives me crazy about phone calls:
1. "The person you are calling has not yet set up a voice mailbox. Please try again later." Really? In 2012?
2. "The number you have reached has been disconnected. Please check the number and try again." This is almost NEVER a data-entry problem on my end. I'm just saying.
3. I call, the phone is answered by a person who says "what do you want?" or "who is this" or some other vaguely hostile non-greeting. I say "Hi, I'm Dr. VBB, and I'm calling about Jane, is this Ms. Dogowner?" and the person responds "Ms. Dogowner? You think I'm a woman? FUCK you, bitch!" and hangs up. Honestly, I feel terrible about making such a grievous error, but I am but an imperfect human. Perhaps if the person who answered the phone did not take such high doses of anabolic steroids, he would have been less aggressively reactive AND maintained a more masculine sounding voice. I'm just saying.
4. I call with lab results, and the owner becomes so hysterical that I am unable to get even halfway through them, and they aren't even that bad. I try to be sympathetic and I always preface any "bad" results with the caution that "this might sound bad, but we have a plan to deal with it," if possible, but some people will hear that their dog had a weak positive on a Lyme antibody test and freak out beyond all reasonable belief. Then I have to be the asshole who has no feelings and has to get off the phone with a crying person so that I don't end up three hours behind in office visits.
5. The chatter. Sometimes, the recipient of the phone call is such a Chatty McChaterson that I wonder if they realize to whom they are speaking. Of course God forbid one of these people shows up for an appointment and I am running five minutes late because I was trying to be polite to Chattina McChatful on the phone that day.
6. Having to give bad news. That just sucks all around.
I could go on, but I've got to go make some calls.