The Cholesterol Biosynthesis Song

As everyone who has studied to become a health professional knows, there is more to our education than simply our clinical training. We have to study the sciences too (some of us more rigorously than others - ha ha). One of the favorite things I learned in veterinary school as far as that goes was the cholesterol biosynthetic pathway.

Pause for reflection.

I can hear you all now. "Dr. VBB, what the hell? What's so exciting about cholesterol biosynthesis anyway? Are you some kind of uber-dork or something?"

Well, first of all - yes. Yes I am. But beyond that, what's so exciting about cholesterol biosynthesis is that one of the late great geniuses of cholesterol research put it to music, and I love that.  Music, I mean. Music and science, so, really, if you put the two together, I become a really cheap date.

So, periodically during lo, these many many years since I graduated from veterinary school, I have searched The Google, in an effort to find the lyrics to this song. Largely I have failed. I have a copy of my own from school, but I could never find where I put them - even when I digitized them and saved them in eleventybillion places with keywords and everything, yo. I'm just disorganized like that. And therefore, it occurred to me, I will put them in the blog today. And then all of my minions will have them too! And if I need them, you can remind me where they are. Yay.

The Cholesterol Biosynthesis Song

lyrics by David Kritchevsky

(to the tune of “Jingle Bells,” btw)

Take an acetate,

Condense it with a mate,

Pretty soon you’ll have

Acetoacetate.

Let ’em have a ball,

You get geraniol.

Add another isoprene

And you’ve got farnesol.

Farnesol, farnesol, good old farnesol,

First it goes to squalene, then you get cholesterol.

Farnesol, farnesol, good old farnesol.

First it goes to squalene, then you get cholesterol.

Now squalene makes a roll,

Becomes lanosterol,

The extra methyls do

Come off as CO2.

Then comes zymosterol,

And then desmosterol.

If you don’t take some Pravachol

You get cholesterol. Oh!

Farnesol, farnesol, good old farnesol,

First it goes to squalene, then you get cholesterol.

Farnesol, farnesol, good old farnesol,

First it goes to squalene, then you get cholesterol.